You'll be relieved to know these guys are off the street:
-> The Thong Bandits of Aryada, Colorado have turned themselves in. This strange duo wore thongs to barely cover their faces while robbing a convenience store and stuffing the loot into a pink backpack.
-> In Arizona a man walked into a local Kwik Shop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Unfortunately, there wasn't as much cash as he would've liked so he tied up the clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and arrested him.
-> Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine in Kentucky. They attached a chain to the machine and to the bumper of their truck but they only succeeded in pulling the bumper off their truck. They gave up and left the scene. They also left the chain attached to the machine, their bumper attached to the chain and their vehicle's license plate still attached to the bumper. Cops found them at home.
In other news, did you hear that Wonder Woman found a body floating in the Potomac River? Of course I feel awful for Helen Johnstone (victim) but I'm still dumbfounded by this situation. Since I heard this story I've had that darn theme song going through my head!